Date: Thu, 02 Oct 2003 19:38:36 -0500 From: Karla Schulz Subject: Carrots and Celery Part Three Chapter Seven Hello children. Sorry it's been so long since the last chapter! Life just got pretty crazy recently. Starting University and all that stuff. Also, I've been attempting to do some rather extensive revision to the ending of the story, making improvements (I hope) and the like. So I held off a little with the posting for that reason as well. But I'm back with the posting thing obviously, and the chapters should continue. Perhaps a bit slower than before, but I promise at least one every two weeks, probably more frequently than that. Thanks to everyone who e-mailed with their concern, wondeirng if I was okay and stuff. Which I am. All alive and not depressed or anything. --- At breakfast the next day, Kyle is sleepy, but seems at peace. He smiles when I sit down. "Morning bro," I say, keeping things casual. "Hey, Care." "You okay?" He nods. "Yeah, I am actually. When I went over," he shrugs. "We just held each other awhile, and that was enough. Then we talked for a bit, but it really did seem like all he wanted was for us to do regular stuff, be normal with each other." "So what'd you do?" He grins sheepishly. "We played Chinese checkers." "What?" I laugh because it just seems weird to me that their definition of normal quality togetherness is playing Chinese checkers. "Don't knock it, man. It's a fun game. And Jonas likes it a lot. He used to play it all the time when he was a kid. He told me once some of his best childhood memories are of playing Chinese checkers with his parents." I'm glad to see only a little heaviness enter Kyle's eyes as he says this, and also to see it soon give way to happiness again. "That's good, Kyle." He nods. "Yeah. Yeah, it's really good." And we go on eating our breakfast in the exact kind of silence you want while eating breakfast while you're eating breakfast with your brother. Later the twins come downstairs, squinting and yawning, still half asleep and yet somehow managing to have perfectly styled their hair in that state. They join us in brotherly silence, and it's good. School is as thrilling as can be expected, which is to say, not at all, but it's doesn't drag quite enough to be PAINFUL, so let's call it an upside. Walking home with Jonas is, I'm pleased to report, relatively trauma free, and though we do talk some about the events of yesterday, there's a confidence and serenity in his voice that's extremely welcome to my ears. And that's quite the accomplishment, considering yesterday included Erica, his parents, and his sister. Home also proves pleasantly relaxed and to the good. Jonas, Kyle and I do the homework thing, and then I decide to pop in on Colin for awhile. Naturally, he welcomes me with open arms. "Uh, why are you here?" I shrug. " 'Cause it's just something I often am these days." "And you like, want to come in or whatever?" "That was my hope, yes," he starts chewing on his lip. "Um, okay." "Dude, I don't like, HAVE to, if you're like busy or whatever..." I'm not like, hurt or whatever, this is just, new and different. Colin being busy. Colin having plans not involving me, bad pop music and more and more frequently crossword puzzles (that's a story for another time). "Well, it's just, I was sort of on my way out," I take a closer look at him, and evaluate the signs. He's embarrassed about where he's going! And now I get to weasel it out of him and make him all self- conscious. Oh joy! "Don't start," comes his warning tone, noting the evil gleam in my eye. I switch to uber-pout. "But it'll be SO much fun." He shakes his head. "I don't have the time. Tomorrow, I promise. You can dig and be nosy, for awhile I'll be coy and evasive, then after 5 minutes or so I'll cave in and tell you. Following that, you can act shocked, then slightly puzzled, and eventually, you'll get over that and just enjoy teasing me about it. Okay?" I grin. "Yeah okay." "So bye, Carrots," I try to make my grin as devious as possible. "Actually, I was sort of planning on waiting around in your bushes, and then following you wherever you've going." He rolls his eyes. "As much as I'd love to have you as my friendly neighborhood stalker, now is just really NOT the time. So asking you politely having failed spectacularly, I will now say this: shove it." I smile and start walking away down his front walk. Stopping to shout over my shoulder, "Only for you!" Which earns me a chuckle, and he calls after me, "Hey Avril!" I turn around and grin at him. "Rock on, rock on?" He nods. "And don't forget to peace out," I wave a hand at him, and then head off down the street. --- "Well?" I demand, poking him in the shoulder. Colin chuckles. "You just pick up right where you leave off, don't you?" I nod. "That's right, now spill." He cocks his head. "Spill? Don't get ahead of yourself, my friend. I promised you at least five minutes of evasiveness, did I not?" I do the pout/glare thing. "You were like, serious?" "Oh quite,." he informs me cheerfully. "Zero percent fun is you." "Life's full of disappointment." "Specially with friends like you." He gives me the `oh yeah, I feel SO sorry for you – not' look. "Whaa, whaa, whaa." "This is you being evasive?" "Or something similar to it, yes." "Just tell me," I happily whine. "No." "No?" "Can't." "Why not?" He grins. "Gotta go to class," and before I can curse at him, or perhaps just strangle his treacherous little neck, the bell rings, and Colin bounces off down the hallway to homeroom. Oh well. He may be safe for now, but I'm going to drop our Law textbook on his foot next period. "Ow, that hurt, you bastard." It's a big textbook. "Yeah, well you deserved it." He glares at me, rubbing his foot. "I did not." "Yeah you did." "I did – no wait. I'm too cool to do that." "If you don't tell me what you were doing last night, I'm gonna smack you in the face with my bendy ruler." He raises his eyebrows at me. "You would really do that to me? I thought we were pals." "Pals don't lord secret activities over each other." He sighs, in a happy way. "Fine, fine. I give up. Are you bracing yourself?" "Yes." "Waiting for it?" "Colin." "Curling." "What?" He shrugs. "I was curling." I blink at him in astonishment. "Like, with the rocks and the brooms and the ice and the," and here comes the most surprising component of all, "TEAMMATES?" He grins. "That's right, Asparagus." "Curling?" "With the rocks and the brooms and the ice and the teammates, yes." "Really." "Really." "I find this news quite baffling." He chuckles. "I can sorta tell." "I mean, you on a team, this is a concept I'm struggling with." "Why?" I snort. "You don't play well with others," he grins. "No, I suppose I don't." "So? Curling? Team? Explain these things to me." "Well, curling is just something I do. I don't know. I admit it' s quite dorky, but like, you know, also, enjoyable in its dorky way. It's a my dad thing. Him and all his best friends in high school curled together." He looks at me in a don't-you-dare-make-fun-of-that way, "They lived in a small town," is how he explains why. "Anyway, it's just something to do. Fills up some time, and it has me interacting with people somewhat resembling my own age, which for a long time got my dad off my back about public school. And it's not OVERLY teamy. Not as much as some sports. There has to be connection and understanding, but other than yelling `hurry', `hurry hard', and `whoa' at people, I don't have to do much other talking." So now it all makes sense in a Colin sort of way, and the making fun of him portion of today's festivities can begin. Knowing what's coming, Colin just sighs. "Bring it on, small fry." --- Time is passing as it does and a new pattern and rhythm has begun to forms in my life. In the morning I eat breakfast with Kyle and the twins, then Jonas comes at some point and we'll walk together to school. While in school, I try to divide my time between Jonas, Colin, Kaleb, and a handful of other people, including Brian and Alex. By lunch I've usually been called homo or fag at least twice, one of Cherrie's bimbo horde has found some way to make my day a little more scarring, and I've learned a thing or two. Had some laughs. None of my other friends (particularly Jonas) have really seemed to warm up to Colin, so we make our own fun. The kind of jokes we laugh about, the things we share, they're not really the kind of thing you can open up to too many people. Part of the fun always has to be that we're the only ones who think something's funny. No one else gets the joke, and we don't want them too. That kind of thing. It's something I'm learning from Colin. He has this whole "I don' t care" attitude I've really come to admire. He's not a mean guy, not at all, but he's just really unconcerned with what other people think of him. If someone doesn't like him, he says, fine. That's cool. Lots of times when people haven't liked me I've asked them why or tried to like, win them over or something. It's just always been the way I am. Colin's totally different. His whole attitude is "this is who I am, take it or leave it." Though it may be something I'm personally impressed by, this philosophy of his hasn't done much for Colin's social status. Basically, I'd say I may be the only person in our entire grade who doesn't think he's an asshole. And you'd really think it would bother him. That, at the very least, part of him has to mind, even if he doesn't show it. But he really doesn't care. I mean, I can tell. In fact, I'm pretty sure he thinks it's funny. It's like, he doesn't think about them, all the people who think he's annoying or a snob or whatever. They don't really cross his mind. H just does his thing. If it wasn't for me, he'd probably just spend this whole day listening to music and totally zoning out. But the thing is, THEY care. All he has to do is sit in class, existing, and it pisses people off. He doesn't have to DO anything. And he loves it. I mean, he really does. You gotta admire that. Sorry. I was supposed to be telling you about my average day. Got a little off track there. Where was I? Lunch, you say? You know, I think you may be right. Good job, dude. Nice to see you were paying attention for once. Yeah right, I know. Off track again. So, lunch. Lunch hour is pretty much the same. It's a Jonas, Alex and Brian thing. We'll hang out together while we eat, and then I'll get up and like, circulate. Spend a little time hanging with Kaleb and his boys (he's gotten quite popular this past year and now travels in something of a pack) and then hook up with Colin for the last like 15-20 minutes. It's still way too freezing to be walking around outside more than absolutely necessary, so mostly we'll just roam the halls or stake out an empty class room. Sometimes we listen to music on his Discman or just talk or whatever. Back in classes for the afternoon, regular stuff. Learning, the odd frightening encounter with a girl, verbal harassment. Maybe it sounds like I'm downplaying all this, and it' s not that I don't think stuff like being harassed for being gay is a big deal, it's just, if I don't care, it doesn' t matter. I know I'm better than them. I know who and what I am is nothing to be ashamed of. They're the idiots, and letting idiots ruin my day just turns me into an idiot too. Not like this always works for me, but I guess it's just Colin' s influence or whatever. He's helping me develop my very own "some people just don't matter" type scowl, and teaching me to say fuck the world and really mean it. Afternoons are thus: homework with Jonas and sometimes Kyle, then dinner. Following dinner, I'll end doing any number of things. Getting trounced by Dave and Jon at a video game or two, watching TV with any combination of family, chilling in Kyle's apartment with just him and Jonas, maybe taking an evening to myself to just read or listen to some tunes, some kind of action with Colin, or talking to Celery on the phone or MSN. Celery and I talk for real about two or three times a week now, and other then that, it's e-mail and messenger or whatever. It's been really good. Very relaxed, very laid back. Nothing too heavy, you know? We still get pretty sappy sometimes, but even that has a more playful side. Mostly anyway. We try to keep it light. The only problem type thing I can think of (but of course I could think of one) is that we don't always get to talk as much as I'd like. We're just really busy, you know? He's got basketball and work and then there's Saul, plus all the normal goings on of life stuff, and I've got all the stuff I' ve already explained. So sometimes we'll each be free on different days and miss each other, or we'll get a hold of one another, but it'll be too late to talk long, or in the middle of a busy evening and there won't be much time to talk. Sometimes too, just because of how much is going on, it's a little hard for us to connect with each other. What I mean is, things are so different for both of us. The things he's doing and the things I'm doing. It's so much different than before when every experience was shared. Our frames of reference being so different, it can be a bit weird sometimes. We can take each other by surprise. Take our conversation yesterday for example. I'd called fairly early in the evening, and our talk had already been going for over an hour. Then, in passing, while we were talking our plans for the coming week, trying to plan phone calls, he said, "Yeah, on Saturday I'll be at the hill most of the day, but if you call by around 9 your time I should be back," I had no idea what he was talking about. "The hill?" "Yeah, the ski hill," more confusion. "You ski now?" He laughed. "No. Snowboarding," I was so surprised, honest to god, I almost dropped the phone. "What?!" "I didn't tell you that?" Um, no. "No," Unable to keep the strangeness out of my voice. SNOWBOARDING? "I really thought I'd mentioned it.," "Believe me, I would have remembered." Another chuckle. "Yeah, I guess so." You guys remember my anti-snowboarding rant right? Right?! "Explain please," I requested dryly. "Oh well, I know its lame and everything, but I'd been going crazy never getting to skate. It doesn't compare, but, well, it's really easy. Like, way easier than skateboarding anyway. The rumors are true," I smiled a little at that, but I still couldn't understand how he'd started actively participating in a sport we'd always shared so much fun loathing about. I felt like I imagine Willow must have felt when she found out Xander was going out with Cordelia. You know, the "I hate Cordeilia club, of which you are treasurer", and "it goes against all rules of God and man", except, replace Cordeilia with snowboarding. Well, not that wigged, but it was definitely weird. Also weird that he didn't tell me. "How long has this been going on?" "Since I got back from Christmas." He sort of sighed, not sadly, just like, apologetically or something. It's hard to explain. "I was so stressed and freaked out, I needed to calm down. But I couldn't skate. Like, Calgary has the Vans Park and it's wicked, but it's not the same you know? If I'm skating to calm down, I need to be alone. Or with you. Anyway, Saul knew I was seriously bugging, and he suggested I give the whole snowboarding thing I try. Believe me, I shut him down a bunch of times, but eventually he wore me down. So I went with him this one time, and I guess, I don't know. I just took to it or whatever. Cause of what I said about it being easier than skating, and that was a plus cause I didn't totally suck so I wasn't all frustrated and shit. Also, it's pretty peaceful. When you go on an off day, and you're on a really empty run, it can be amazing. Drive out to the hill, surrounded by mountains, it's pretty sweet." I was confused still in some ways, but it made me happy to hear the like, serenity in his voice and I was glad he has a place like that, even if it was just in his memory at that moment. "So anyway, since I was getting pretty stoked on it, I decided to like, get myself a board and everything. I got a set up cheap from this dude Marcus who works with me at Skate," that' s a skate shop in Calgary. He's been working there pretty much since he moved. "And a season pass to the hill, and that's about it. I go usually every weekend. That's why I'm hardly ever there until the evening." "Oh well, cool I guess. I'm glad you're having fun." "Well, I am, but not nearly as much fun as I'd be having if you were there too," I smiled, in a like, knew-it-was- coming-still-glad-to-hear-it kind of way. You know, the sometimes we like to be reminded of stuff even if we've heard it a million times thing. "Thanks, sweet one." "Hey, you don't have to thank me. I love you." "I love you too," I felt myself getting a little said, just 'cause I knew that by saying that, we were getting ready to say goodbye. "Talk to you again, what was it? Wednesday?" "Yeah," it was Sunday we were having this conversation, and it's Monday now. "Okay, I'm looking forward to it already." "Me too." "Love you, baby." "Ditto. Bye, Cel." "Tra la." So yeah. Sometimes things get a little weird, or different. But it always turns out fine. Better than even. Life is good. And I'm happy. --- Like all the chapters have been for a good long while, this one was edited by my late editor Ed Wootan. He was a really great guy, who sadly passed away recently. So I don't know, I guess this is where I thank him one last time for all the work he did for me.