Jarv checked into the Ritz at four-thirty. After showering, he watched the news until it was time to meet Scott in the dining room. Scott was already seated at the table when he arrived.
"Good evening, Scott, I hope you weren't waiting long. I understand you've been busy at the hospital while I've been in New York."
The waiter came over to take their drink order. "This is a special occasion tonight, I would like to order a bottle of your best champagne."
"You look wonderful, baby. I have been handling a heavier case load, and it's been rough. Sorry I didn't return your calls; by the time I got in, it was too late to call you."
The waiter brought the champagne and poured them each a glass, took their order and left.
"What's the special occasion, Jarv?"
Jarv smiled, "It's really a toast for three events for me, and I thought it would be fitting to have it in this room since this is where it all started. First, let me tell you the good news I wanted to share with you Monday night. You would have been proud of me Scott. Thanks to Grant, I've landed that account I've been sweating bullets over for the MacDonald Stevens Corporation. I've made it, Scott, my future is assured. My second peace of good news is that I've formed my own company. As of this morning, I have started the wheels in motion to purchase my division from Carnabee, Carter & Darlington."
"Congratulations, Jarv, this is great news. You've done what you said you would; I'm proud of you." He raised his glass to toast Jarv.
"What's the third event, Jarv?"
"Let's wait on that one until after dinner. In case I haven't told you lately, I think you are still the most handsome man in this crazy world, and I love you deeply. I was reminiscing, as I flew over the ocean, of the wonderful sailing weekends we spent together while growing up, and of the great plans we had for our future. Our lives have been so closely bound together. For me, it has been a love affair that has endured for these past sixteen years. Every year was better than the last. Marrying you was the culmination of everything that was beautiful and good in my world. I don't think any straight couple had the happiness we shared over the years."
"Even though I endured it, I hated leaving you ever Monday morning, but I knew, if we were ever to have the life style that our friends enjoy, we both had to make the sacrifices and the hard work it would take to get to that point. We both knew how long it takes for a doctor to start earning a comfortable living. I don't have to remind you of that. We both knew that I had the best chance at making big bucks. I know you said that it didn't matter, and you were right.
Scott, I know you still cling to the attitude that I'm your younger brother, and you're my provider. That is very noble and praiseworthy. You also knew before we married that I had a goal in life that conflicted with your views on the matter. I admit, I hid my true earnings from you because it made you uncomfortable. My plan all along was to earn enough money to buy you a practice when you finished up at Emory."
The waiter cleared the plates away and each ordered brandy and coffee.
Jarv smiled at Scott and continued his conversation after the water took the check.
"I'm sorry if I've monopolized the entire conversation through dinner, but, it was important to me."
"Jarv, baby, you know I love to listen to you. You're the one with the exciting life, please go on."
"I must confess, I was disappointed that you did not call me back Monday night about this big contract, since you knew how much it meant to both of us. When Todd heard the news, he flew up to have dinner with me that same night. I felt disappointed that you weren't there to share the most important event of my career with the one person that means the most to me. My life was shattered after my telephone call to Grant on Monday."
Scott turned as white as the tablecloth. He said in a week voice, "Wait, Jarv, I can explain."
"Please wait until I've finished, Scott. I would like to hear your explanation for the lie you've told me when you sat down tonight. The second and final blow came later that evening when I heard of the gossip circulating about the adulterous affair you were having with Cathy Caldwell. The reason I've taken so long to have dinner tonight is because I wanted to see your handsome face one last time before I leave you."
I could see that Scott was visibly shaken, he almost dropped his glass. He opened his mouth to speak, but nothing came out; he just stared at me.
"I thought it was fitting that we have our last dinner together here, because this is the hotel were we made our marriage commitment and where we had our first dinner together as a married couple. This has been the most wonderful and the most depressing week of my life. I was dreading this last meeting with you, because of the deep love I have for you. I had to see your face; I had to know if there was still some spark of honesty left in you. As far as I'm concerned you have ripped my heart out and cast it on the rubbish heap."
"I remember vividly, the night you proposed to me, you told me to open my heart to you, that you would never hurt me. I did as you asked, and you stabbed me. I loved you with ever fiber of my being, Scott, and you have wounded me beyond belief. When I think of the deceit, the lies and the total disregard you felt for me, I feel sad and deeply hurt. I decided last night to give you up so you can never hurt me again. I can't think what I did to deserve this kind of treatment from you. How could you be so devious?"
"Everything I've done was for our future. I worked long hard hours and fell into bed exhausted every night to earn the money to set you up in your own practice. And this is my reward. You know, I've suspected something was going on, yet I felt that you would come to me and discuss any problem you had. I trusted you because I loved you and thought you loved me, at least that was what you kept telling me."
The waiter came back and he signed the back of the bill with his room number. He pulled out a fifty dollar tip and handed to the waiter.
"Scott, will you be on duty tomorrow?"
"Yes, I have to be in early tomorrow."
"Good, than you won't be around when I clear out my clothes. I want nothing from that apartment. Everything in the checking account is yours. I've taken my name off our joint checking and savings accounts. I've also deposited $250,000 in the savings account as a divorce settlement. It would save us both a lot of embarrassment it you would let the folks know in advance when you'll be home, so our paths don't cross. Thank you for being patient; now, if there's nothing else, I'm off."
"Jarv, please don't do this to me, I love you, let me explain, I don't love Cathy, please let me explain."
"I will listen to your explanation if you can answer this one question honestly, have you been having an affair with Cathy Caldwell?"
"I admit I was seeing her, but I don't love her. I only love you, Jarv, please believe me."
"I believe you Scott, but, you have inflicted me with enough pain to last a lifetime. When do you intend to take responsibility for your actions? When are you going to grow up? Until you do that, my love, you never will be happy. I can't see you anymore, because I love you too much. You were always my only weakness. This affair with Cathy is Margot and Princeton all over again. I don't plan to go through that again. Take the money I've given you and see a good psychiatrist. You don't know who you are. If you're straight, than go for it, it's a hell of a lot better that being a homosexual like me.
I'm a homosexual and my orientation will never change. I don't have sex with the females, nor will become involved with bisexual men. Until you understand who, or what you are, you will continue to repeat the same mistakes again. You lost me when you started playing around with Cathy. So if your desire is to marry her that's your business from now on. You're free to do as you wish; you're not my concern any longer and I never want to see you again."
"Jarv, you can't end it just like that, not after what we've meant to each other."
"Scott, my love, I didn't end our marriage, you did. You should have thought of what you doing before you started screwing your girlfriend. The funny thing is she will drop you when she gets tired of you. Don't make this any harder that it is, and I certainly don't want to hear any more of your excuses. Good by, Scott, and have a good life." He got up and left.
"I appreciate your giving up your Saturday to have lunch with me, Bobbie. This has been one hell of a week for me."
"What's wrong, Jarv? You look awful."
"Scott and I have split up. That's the reason that I've invited you for lunch, and also to ask for your help. I'm not going into any of the details. I can tell you that Scott was unfaithful to me and I ended our partnership Thursday night. What I'm about to say may sound melodramatic, but I going to ask you and the family to never discuss Scott when I'm around. Also, if you know he is going to be attending a family function, I ask that you warn me in advance. As far as I'm concerned, Scott does not exist."
"Jesus, Jarv, what did he do that was so terrible, surely you didn't dump him for being unfaithful just once, did you? From what I have been able to learned from my gay clients, they seem to have a new lover every few months. You and Scott have been together three years now, are you willing to give that up?"
Jarv smiled, "You could say the same thing about many straight couples. Your clients are confusing a fling with a meaningful relationship. In any event, what other people do is no concern of mine. It really boils down to what you as a person, think a loving marriage should be like. Our marriage was not any different to me than your marriage, or our parents' marriage. The only difference between us is that ours was not legal or blessed by the church. To me it was just as binding. Perhaps if gay marriages were legalized it would create a more stable environment for gay couples. So many gay people confuse a sexual relationship with marriage, which it's not. I'm disappointed that you took my marriage to Scott in such a cavalier way. You seem to share the same sense of values as Scott. If that's the case, maybe you should examine your own marriage. How would you react if Dan was having an affair with another man, or woman for that matter?"
"I don't think I'd throw him out, but I can't say for sure. I'd have to have all the facts, I guess."
"That's interesting. If Dan gave you a good reason for having an affair, you would overlook his indiscretions? What about the second, and the third time? Could you trust him again? If you are willing to accept that kind of a relationship, I feel sorry for you. I will try and explain this to you so you know how I feel, and why I feel this way. I've loved Scott for a long, long time. I've known I was gay since junior high school. Four years ago, I realized I was in love with Scott. As you know, I told him how I felt. He told me that he loved me as a brother, and was sorry he could not love me in the way I would like, because he was straight. I was unhappy, but accepted his answer. At least, it was off my chest, and he knew how I felt about him. Yet, in spite of that, he admitted he was sexually attracted to me, and was hitting on me all weekend. When I left that Sunday, I told him that I had to get him out of my system and it would be better if we didn't see each other again until I could deal with my problem."
"The next time we met, he told me he was in love me with and so we became a couple. You know the rest. I love Scott more than anything in this world; this will never change. Sure, I could forgive him, after all that's what loving someone is all about. Unfortunately, Scott is like an alcoholic. He's doomed to repeat the same mistake over and over again. He's been like that since we were kids. If it isn't Margot or Cathy, it would be some other woman. I can't live with a person like that. I'd end up in the funny farm."
"Scott needs to seek professional help; I'm not qualified to do that, nor do I wish to be drawn into the unrealistic life he has chosen. I must get on with my own life, and raise my own family. This was something Scott and I planned to do when we could afford to raise children. Now that I'm a millionaire, I plan to go it alone."
"What! When did this happen, little brother?"
"Last year, and I should be a multimillionaire in five years if everything goes as planned. Ironic, isn't it. Now that I have the money to buy Scott his practice, he's not around to enjoy it. Oh, well, life sucks sometimes. I didn't leave Scott high and dry. I gave him over a quarter of a million dollars. I'm also changing my last name to King-Purdey. Remember that when you see my name in the society pages."
"Congratulations, Jarv, I always knew you would make it big one day. But, the folks are going to be shocked about you and Scott breaking up."
"Mom will take it hard, but I think Dad will be pleased. Deep down, I don't think he wanted to believe that Scott was gay. I've always felt that Dad considered me a negative influence on Scott. Now, he doesn't have to worry about my influencing Scott any longer."
"I know you're smarter than Scott; hell, you're a lot smatter the all of us, but I can't believe Dad would feel that way, Jarv. Or are you lashing out because you lost Scott?"
"You believe what you want, Bobbie, but Scott told me what his father said. A funny thing, Mom was relived that I was there to take care of Scott, because he was easily lead. This is one of the reasons I don't want to talk about Scott. For that matter, I don't plan to ever go home again, too many bad memories. I've already starting looking for a place to raise my children and it will be large enough to have the family visit me."
"What about this penthouse?"
"Todd and I own it now. You'll meet him at our cocktail party when we announce the grand opening of our agency. He used to be my boss now he is my partner and a super guy to boot."
"Jarv, Dan and I are driving out to the Island to see the folks tomorrow, would you like me to break the bad news to Mom. Someone has to tell her about you and Scott; she needs to know."
"Thanks, Bobbie, please tell Mom that I would like her to come into town when she is free and spend the weekend so we can talk. I've haven't the foggiest when that will be. I'll try to make it soon, but I'm going to be a very busy guy for the next several months. I have more on my plate than I can handle right now, plus the fact that I'll be on the road a lot."
"This has been very stressful time for me, Bobbie. Sometimes the heartache comes in waves, at the craziest times," Jarv said. "I've succeeded in controlling the waterworks during the day, which takes all my powers of concentration." Jarv's eyes filled with tears. "Please let me know if anything serious happens to him, or if he really needs my help. I miss him so much, Bobbie. My shrink has given me tranquilizers to relax me, yet I find they interfere with my concentration.
Well, I've taken up enough of your time. If you're about ready, I'll see you out. I'm heading back to the office; this breakup with Scott has really screwed up my schedule. Please forgive me, if I've upset you. This must be as unpleasant for you, as it was for me. In any event, I felt you had to know. I'm sure Scott will be in touch with you, sooner or later. He'll need the family's support about now, but again, I will absolutely refuse to talk with him or about him from now on."
"Oh, Jarv, you're not upsetting me, I love you and I hate to see you suffering like this. I'm sorry this had to happen to my two favorite people. Look if you need me at all, I'm only a short ride away."
Scott had settled into his room, at the Plaza Hotel on Monday night. He called his mother to confirm their dinner date. He knew his dad was at a convention in Washington. His Mom agreed to meet the train at the Islip LIRR station. She insisted he stay over night and take an early train back into Manhattan in the morning.
After a pleasant dinner at the Chalet Restaurant, one of their favorites, they drove back to the house.
"I'll be a few minutes, Scott, I want to slip into my housecoat and check on the girls. Why don't you fix me a Scotch and water while you're waiting?"
"As usual the girls are engrossed in a movie," his mom said. "Let's sit in your father's study. It's more private." He carried their drinks in and they got comfortable.
"This is better; now tell me what's bothering you Scott?"
Scott smiled, "You and Jarv could always read me like a book. Mom, I need you to talk to Jarv for me. He won't answer my letters or telephone calls. After four years of therapy my doctor told me that I'm cured. Dad is not going to be a happy camper, but at this point I'm not concerned with what anyone thinks, except Jarv. It's taken me four years to finally accept the fact that I am a homosexual. You have no idea how many times I've tried to reach Jarv. Mom, I love Jarv more than I ever though possible. I must see him again to ask for his forgiveness and to see if there is a chance we can be brothers again? Will you please help me?"
"It tears me apart every time I see him in one of his TV spots. Will you tell Jarv that I love him and there will never be anyone but him? There has not been anyone since I divorced Cathy. He is in my thoughts every day and I miss him so."
"We all do, Scott. It hasn't been easy for him either. The children have helped him adjust, and he has mellowed with time. It's not a pleasant situation for either one of you. He also told me he has never dated since the breakup. His priorities are work and his children. His three children are absolutely precious. They are adorable and as smart as their father. They look just like Jarv. Did you know he named his eldest son after you? The younger son is named Jarv, and he named his daughter Bobbie, and she is rightly named, she is just like her aunt."
"I love both of you and I was not happy when you broke up. You made a foolish mistake marring Cathy, but, I think in the long run it was something you had to get out of your system. As painful as the break was, I feel that Jarv made the right decision. If he hadn't, you may have hurt each other again. You are more mature now and hopefully, a lot wiser, maybe this is the time for reconciliation. But I don't know how Jarv is going to take this. I love him dearly, but he can be extremely headstrong, that stubborn streak of his has not changed since he was a youngster."
"Jarv was always a remarkable child. Every mother thinks the world of her children and feels that they are the smartest and most beautiful in the world. Jarv happened to be an exceptional child. He was different from the rest of you. Jarv took life very seriously and had a passion to learn. He had a inquiring mind and had remarkable powers of concentration. I remember the pictures he would draw as a six year old and tell me stories of how he was going to be a big businessman one day and make lots, and lots of money. No question in my mind that he inherited his father's creative talents. Jarv was always in complete control of his feelings. I'm his mother and I can't predict what's behind that charming facade. That is probably the reason he has been so successful in business."
"Most parents are not pleased to learn that their child is a homosexual. I include myself in that group. In my case, it's not because of the fear of AIDS, but rather for the rejection that you and Jarv will experience from society. There is so much hate in the world against homosexuals. No parent wants to see their children exposed to that kind of treatment. When I learned that you and Jarv were to be a couple, I was relieved, because I felt that you would take care of each other. Jarv has built a wall around his emotions since you left him. It has only been in the last year that he has opened up and talked about you. I feel that he may be ready to talk to you again. I just don't know."
"Jarv is not the same person you knew four years ago. He is a mature self assured, wealthy man. He is attentive, meticulous, sophisticated and absolutely the most charming host. Jarv has a way of making you feel that you are the most important person in the room. He makes you feel genuinely welcome. He staff is not to be believed. They are efficient and absolutely top notch. His home and estate are absolutely beautiful, both inside and out. As many times as I've been in his home, I am awestruck by it's understated elegance. The majority of his furnishings in the public rooms are priceless antiques. Spending a weekend with Jarv is always an exciting occasion. It's as if high society moved to the Retreat. The dinner parties are elegant and stimulating. His neighbors and friends are the movers and shakers of industry. Each dinner party is better than the last. After a weekend with Jarv, I go home feeling uplifted. I've yet to meet a boring person at the Retreat. I've seen more famous people at the Steven's brunches than I have on television."
"The family is always welcome. Your father and I spend a lot of time with the children. Jarv offered to build a home for us on his property, but your dad wants to stay with Sperry until he retires. One of the reasons we all like to spend the Christmas holidays with Jarv is because of the enjoyable time we all have. It is a storybook Christmas, the entertainment and the parties are wonderful and they are not confined to the Retreat either. Sometimes we are invited to attend dinner parties at other friend's estates. We spent one weekend at the Harcourt estate in the Hampton's. For New Years Eve, we were flown to Paradise Island in the Caribbean to celebrate the New Year."
"I thought Jarv and Dad didn't get along that well," Scott said.
"Jarv sat your father and me down after the children were born and told us that we were his children's only grandparents and he did not want them to be deprived of having a normal family relationship. He told your father that the knife wound in his back had healed and only the scar remained. As far as he was concerned, he forgave him choosing Cathy over him. Jarv said he was not going to allow that to stand in the way of seeing his grandchildren. I was so proud of Jarv at that moment. He put the happiness of his children and his family above his own feelings."
"How did Dad take it?"
"He was shocked and embarrassed. Your dad didn't think that Jarv knew that he sided with Cathy. It took your father a long time to recover. Your father is a good man and he didn't realize that Jarv felt betrayed."
"In any event, I'm going to twist his arm until he agrees to see you. If he agrees, I suggest that you don't come on too strong; let him make all the moves, he will anyway."
"Thanks, Mom."
She stood and kissed him on the cheek, "Goodnight, dear, I'm off to bed. Thanks for the lovely dinner and I'll see you at breakfast in the morning."
"Jarv, did I catch you at a bad time," his mother asked?
"No, Mom, I was reading a report, is everything okay?"
"Jarv, I want to ask you for a big favor, it's pay back time."
"Sure, Mom, anything you want."
"Scott was in town for a visit and he wants desperately to see you. For my sake, will you please talk to him?"
"You've got it Mom. I'm flying to Brazil first thing tomorrow morning and will be gone for several weeks. Ask him to call my secretary, Sandy. She will know my schedule and will make all the arrangements to have him fly to the Retreat for a long weekend. Are you happy now, Mom?"
"Thank you, dear, and Jarv, please be nice."
Jarv chuckled, "Have you ever known me to be otherwise? I'm a pussycat, you know that, Mom."
"I know that, darling, but some people think you're a tiger." His mother related her conversation with Scott. "Well, darling, I don't want to keep you any longer; I love you, Jarv, have a safe trip."
"I love you, too, Mom."